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This portal was created for entertainment purposes only. All commentary, criticism, parody, speech, satire, and other content published herein is protected by united states law. It sounds very important, doesn't it?

YES SIR, I
WAIVE MY RIGHTS!

By clicking above, you agree: All observers of this content are knowingly and willfully participating in a legally binding endeavour. Should 'Rob Kaufman' ever be wrongfully penalized or in any way harmed for the lawful speech published via this portal, you hereby agree to classify yourself as an 'accessory' and 'co-conspirator' to any crime, civil or otherwise, and will publicly attest to the innocence of 'Rob Kaufman.' Failure to adhere to this agreement will result in very severe punitive damages, a debt of over $1M payable to 'Rob Kaufman.'

YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!